Recent Articles
On good food and friends
Aug 14, 2010 Family life Leave a comment
We just came back from some friends of ours. They invited us to an Indian dinner. They made dahl, chicken, rice and naan bread… We (well, mostly Zak) made samosas and Indian spiced donuts. It was the first time either of us made donuts, and we were amazed with how easy it turned out to be. They are also relatively healthy because they are made with whole-wheat flour and absorb very little oil. But most of all, they are amazingly yummy! I mean, the other foods were also very good, but the donuts! Wow!
It’s really great to have those friends around because not only are they very nice and interesting, they have a son that ours loves to play with and who has lots of cool toys. So while we adults were having a meaningful conversation downstairs, the kids were playing upstairs in the boy’s bedroom, interrupting us only once every few minutes instead of the usual every few seconds. And best of all: they live in our building. So when the kids get too tired, when we realize it’s late and we should put everyone to bed, we are only an elevator ride away from home.
For quite a while after we moved to Vancouver we didn’t have many friends. We would meet people and then they would move away. It was very frustrating. And to be fair, my best friend is still the one I have had since sixth grade and who lives at the other end of the country. But in the last few years, we have met lots of nice people around here, some in prenatal classes or some other ways linked to our son, and many in our building. It’s people that we can have dinner or tea or a beer with once in a while, people we can trade recipes with, people we can count on to water our plants when we go away or to borrow an egg from when we realize we’re short one in the middle of baking something. More than that: I know I could count on them to take care of my child in an emergency.
So as I am reflecting upon my day, I am thinking that it’s good to have friends again…
Should I be worried?
Aug 14, 2010 Family life, Rant Leave a comment
We went on a visit of the Maternity Ward at the hospital where I am supposed to give birth… Our hope was that by seeing where we would be for the birth, our son would be less worried about us leaving him behind (to be cared for by someone else). I’m not sure it worked as there were so many couples that it was hard for our boy to see. And a side effect of the visit is: now I’m the one who’s worried.
The nurse who did the tour with us, who is one of the Maternity nurses, actually said that “babies are born blind” and that “they can’t recognize your face until they’re about six months old”. She also mentioned really deep things like “breast milk is better for the baby because it reduces the risks of allergies and stuff”, and that “the content of breast milk is actually better for the baby than formula”. At least those last two are true. Broad and obvious to any parent who has read anything (even formula advertisements admit that breast is best), but not false, unlike the first two.
Every single book I have ever read about babies says that they can see about the distance from the breast to the face when they are born. I also remember reading that they cannot focus very well and things are blurry, but they are certainly not blind. When I did a quick search tonight, I found that new studies seem to show that babies can see much further than the 10 inches usually stated, although they cannot focus their gaze accurately. As for not recognizing a face before 6 months, that’s just ridiculous! And she’s a maternity ward nurse! I guess it’s better than pediatrics, she only has to deal with the babies for a few days. But it did get me worried. I do not want this nurse to be the one with me at my child’s birth!
It’s still us!
Aug 9, 2010 Uncategorized Leave a comment
We have finally updated our Website. I think we were 10 versions of the software behind! So we have a brand new look. True, the photo galleries have disappeared, but Zak is setting up a Smugmug account for us. We will be able to post our photos and videos in private or public galleries. We’ll keep you posted! We figured that we should probably try and organize our photos at least once every new baby… you know! So enjoy this change because it might be the last 
That was a party!
Aug 6, 2010 Family life 1 Comment
We had a few friends of our son’s here tonight for his birthday. We blew up tons of small balloons, plus two giant 3-foot ones, and the kids hit them around the courtyard for a while. Then we had the awesome cake Zak had spent the whole week preparing. In case I haven’t mentioned it yet, here is how it goes: home made chocolate-butter cookies crumbled into a crust mixed with home-made fudge sauce to hold it together, then a layer of home-made chocolate ice cream, followed by another layer of crust, then home-made vanilla ice cream. He shaped it like a moon, made craters and added moon characters for authenticity and more crumbled cookies for meteors (and yumminess). It took several days because each step had to be done separately. But let me tell you: no adult actually passed up on it. Many had seconds. A few even had thirds. Here’s what it looked like:
It went remarkably well. There was no tantrums (none! and we had five kids between barely two and just over four!). Our son didn’t even cry when one of the giant balloons popped. He shared the balloons and other toys, he spent about 45 minutes eating cake (while all the other kids had gone back to playing), he put cake all over himself (which is part of the fun, right?) and I had time for decent, adult conversation with friends of ours.
Our boy went biking on his new bike this morning and he can already bike by himself! Zak had to help him get started, but then he actually let go of the bike and it was fine. Without training wheels. On a 16 inch bike. On his third birthday. I’m impressed. Maybe it’s the flames on his helmet? And no, he didn’t go down that hill. Not today. But it will come. I’m scared already!
Today was also my last day of work until August 15, 2011! That was nice to write on my out-of-office auto-reply message. Officially I’m on holiday next week, then my mat leave starts. I hope the baby waits at least a couple of weeks so that the two kids are not too close together – you know, so that Zak has time to do another ice cream cake in the interval. I know kids hate it when their birthdays are so close together that they get celebrated together. But we’ll see. We’re not quite ready yet… I have a foot-long to-do list.
Maybe I’ll start with going to bed. Now that I’m off, sleeping is at the top of my preoccupations.
Good night!
On his third birthday…
Aug 6, 2010 Uncategorized Leave a comment
My son’t first words this morning, as he came out of his room at 6:45?
- Hi Gourou! (to the cat).
Then he made his way in our bedroom:
- Maman, I want it to be wake-up time now.
Well, it was. Happy birthday!
Happy birthday!
Aug 6, 2010 Family life 5 Comments
My son is turning three today. I can hardly believe it. He’s not a toddler anymore. He’s officially a preschooler. What can (should) I say about (to) him on this very special day? How can I explain this amazing trip journey I have taken because of him in the last three years. He has changed our lives, all right. And over the years there have been some good and some bad days. But overall, of course, I could never imagine going back to how it was before he was here.
My son was born on a Statutory holiday, a Monday, after a very short and (relatively) easy labor. Through the ordeal (all 7 hours of it), Zak was amazing. Our doctor was amazing. The labor nurse was amazing. My son was, of course, amazing. He still is.
Those three years went by so fast! My baby boy went from, as my brother so nicely put it, a state close to that of a larvae to a full-fledged human that cannot go unacknowledged. From not being able to hold up his head to walking, then running, and now biking. From crying to babbling to saying a few words to showing a sense of humor to sustaining long conversations on complicated concepts. And we have changed, too. Becoming parents is hard, but I think it makes us better people. At least on most days.
My son fascinates me every day with his cleverness. He has the funnest imagination. He is super affectionate – with me, we could even say clingy, but he’s affectionate with Zak too and doesn’t spare hugs and kisses. He’s social with other people. He loves animals, diggers and space shuttles, sports of all sorts, fruits, chocolate and ice cream. Especially chocolate ice cream.
Three years ago (already?), I was holding him against me for the first time. Now I am about to give birth to his sibling. I am slightly terrified at the thought of what will happen, but I am hoping we will find a balance that won’t be too hard for him. I know I won’t be able to focus as much attention on my big boy anymore, but he will never cease to be special to me. It’s with him that I became a mother, and I know that thanks to him I will feel more competent this time around. It’s him that made my husband into a stay-at-home dad – the best I could have imagined. And although he has tested our marriage in more than one ways, he has also cemented it in just as many ways.
He is only three, and yet he is so grown up. He is reaching milestones towards independence every day. This year, he was weaned. He stopped wearing diapers (except at night, and even then he’s dry most nights). He started really playing with other children. He developed language to an all-new level and now masters really complicated thought processes. Him and I were separated for several days for the first time. He officially outgrew the backpack carrier, which means he now has to walk when we go hiking (which means we can’t hike much anymore). He learned to pick fruit. He started having nightmares. And he just received, for his birthday, a big boy bike – with pedals. I’m telling you: he’s taking wings.
Next year will be just as busy. He will, of course, have a sibling soon, but he will also start preschool in September. That will be a big one! I really hope we’ll be able to keep giving him our best despite having to share our attention with another child. He deserves it. He can be so stubborn, but he is also so smart! Sometimes we worry about him acting aggressively, but he can also show so much empathy!
I know this post is very random, but there are so many things I would like to say, so many things I would like my son to be able to read some day. Especially how much I love him. I will never stop loving him, just like I haven’t stopped loving him since that day three years ago when he decided it was time to see the world. I will be there to hold and hug him for as long as he needs me nearby. No matter what happens, I’ll always be his mother.
Bonne fête mon amour!
Much ado about nothing…
Aug 5, 2010 Uncategorized Leave a comment
I came in to work at 8:30 this morning. There was a message on my voice mail from the ultrasound clinic saying they had a cancellation at 9 if I still wanted to change my appointment. I called back, wondering if they would be open (the message had been left at 4:30 the day before, just after I left work). Miraculously, they were open and the spot was still available. I jumped on a bus and I was there 15 minutes later.
So it turns out the baby is definitely head down. From what I was able to see, it also has a spine, two arms, two feet that are definitely kicking me in the ribs, a nose, a mouth and five fingers on at least one of the hands. He/she was sucking his/her thumb during the ultrasound. The technician also said the cord was not wrapped around the neck and there was still a good amount of fluid. All good (as long as the baby doesn’t decide to turn again, but that would be surprising).
I guess I’m all set now for a natural delivery. Hopefully I won’t have any more surprises… Now I can concentrate on our son and make sure everything is ready for his birthday tomorrow!