When does the Oedipe’s complex kick in?

I love my son, but sometimes I feel like he loves me too much. And it is getting really annoying!

When Zak is alone with him, during the week, everything is great. I mean, of course my son is still a 2-year-old, with occasionally frustrating and testing behaviors, but he is generally nice with his father and behaves decently. Evenings and weekends – when mommy is home – he turns into a bit of a monster, and I’m not sure how to deal with it.

He wants me all the time. If Zak tries to do something for him – take him to the bathroom, go get him in the morning, anything – we are in for endless negotiations or simple tantrums. I try to fight it – I will, on purpose, tell him that I cannot hold his hands because my hands are full, ask Daddy, or I cannot help you right now, ask Daddy, and sometimes it works. But sometimes he’ll just be willing to wait until I’m free. Yesterday I had to move him away from me, physically, as he wanted to sit so close that I had absolutely no breathing room. We tried to teach him the concept of personal space. I mean, I love him and I love to cuddle, but there is a time and a place, don’t you think? Should I really have to have a 2-and-a-half-year-old grafted to me every single minute I’m home?

I know he’s still young, I understand that he misses me during the week, but it’s starting to be hard to put up with. Especially when he gets really rude to his dad. It’s uber-frustrating for Zak, who is after all the main care provider. But I don’t know what to do. I used to try and be the main caregiver on weekends to give Zak some relief, and these days I give him more room even when I’m there so as not to encourage our boy in his obsession. But I do want to spend time with my son when I’m home, too.

Zak was saying that he really does feel like he’s in a pissing match for my attention (excuse the vulgarity), a “boys competing for a woman” kind of attitude from our son. Is it too early for Oedipe? Because it sure feels like it!

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